Laugh Out Loud

I recently asked my husband where is his favourite restaurant? He answered, "Mamee's !" I responded to him, "I've heard of Mimi's, where is Mamee's?" With a smile on his face, he answered, "at our place!"

Laugh Out Loud

We were setting up for our farmers market. My husband put a sign up that read, "buttnut squash for sale". My daughter Vanessa noticed the sign and said, "Mom you've got to change the sign!" I said, "leave the sign up and lets see if anyone notices it". Well, to make a long story short I told Vanessa to take the sign down! (I'm afraid, my husband doesn't spell very well) (Saturday, Sept 11-2010)

Laugh Out Loud

Our family just got back from visiting our son, Nathan in Washington
State! Nathan's son, Jared was visiting with our daughter Rebecca
and asking questions! All at once, Jared asked Rebecca, "who are
you?" Rebecca just looked at him and said nothing. Jared blurted
out and said, "you are, Auntie Utah!"

Strawberry Delight

12 - 5 ounce Dessert Cups
1 pint of Whipping Cream
Strawberry Sauce
1/4 cup Fine Walnuts (about)

Directions: Make the Strawberry Sauce: 1-lb (2 cups of sliced
or chopped strawberries), 1/2 cup sugar, 2-3 teaspoons corn-
starch, 2 tablespoon water, and 2 tablespoon of strawberry
preserves / or jam.
Mix the cornstarch in water and put in saucepan.
Put all ingredients in saucepan and bring to a boil.
Reduce heat,until it thickens.
Whip the whipped cream; can add sugar to taste. (2 tsps)
Take the dessert cups out of its wrapper; they are sticky.
I usually spread a little butter on the bottoms and place
them on a plate. Fill the dessert cups with the sauce.
Then top with the whipped cream; (can use a dessert
decorator to jazz up your dessert)
Garnish with fine walnuts; if desire.
The dessert is lovely for a Summer Treat! and great for a
Family Potluck!!
Enjoy! .............Your heart will be lighter!!!

Lynda's Chicken Chow Mein

Lynda's Chicken Chow Mein
(yields 5-6 servings)

14 ounces of farkay chow mein noodles ( I use only 12 ounces of the package)
1 pound of chicken tenders
1 medium onion - chopped or chopped fine if preferred
1/2 cup chopped fine celery
1 cup chopped or sliced cabbage (optional, but I like it)
1/2 of large pepper (your choice of pepper)
salt and pepper to taste
6 eggs
Directions:
1. In a large pot boil the farkay noodles for about 3-5 minutes;
(should be a rolling boil); drain and set aside.
2. Cut the chicken tenders into small pieces; then fry in
skillet until no longer pink.
3. Add onions, celery, cabbage, peppers to skillet; and
add 1 tablespoon of butter for flavor; saute' for
about 5-8 minutes, or until done.
4. Then add the chow mein noodles to the skillet;
add 1/8 cup water, cover the skillet then let
steam for 5 minutes and mix gently; then add
1/8 cup water again and let steam for another
5 minutes, mixing gently.
5. Let the chow mein cook for another 10 minutes;
remove cover, mix gently, the chow mein should
be done. (You can taste the noodles and check
for doneness) I usually have it on med-low heat.


6. In a frying pan/skillet; cook your omelette. In
a medium bowl: add eggs, salt & pepper to taste,
add milk or cream (I use less than 1/4 cup), may
add cinnamon for flavor. Combine well and cook
in skillet until done. (can add shredded cheese
if preferred); Cook slowly about 5-10 minutes
until puffed and set. Lift edges of omelette with
spatula while cooking. Omelette should be gold-
en when done. Spread the omelette strips on the
chow mein. (slice the omelette into strips, or can
be served on a plate).
Enjoy! .......It's one of my favourite recipes!!
Chow!!!
(Note: use a non-stick skillet)

Laugh Out Loud

An elderly man lay dying in his bed. In death's agony,
he suddenly smelled the aroma of his favorite chocolate
chip cookies wafting up the stairs. He gathered his
remaining strength, and lifted himself from the bed.
Leaning against the wall, he slowly made his way out
of the bedroom, and with even greater effort forced
himself down the staris, gripping the railing with
both hands, he crawled downstairs.
With labored breath, he leaned against the door
frame, gazing into the kitchen. were it not for
death's agony, he would have thought himself
already in heaven. There, spread out upon waxed
paper on the kitchen table, were literally hundreds
of his favorite chocolate chip cookies.
Was it heaven? Or was it one final act of heroic
love from his devoted wife, seeing to it that he
left this world a happy man?
Mustering one great final effort, he threw himself
toward the table, landing on his knees in a rumpled
posture. His parched lips parted; the wondrous
taste of the cookie was already in his mouth, seem-
ingly bringing him back to life.
The aged and withered hand trembled on its way
to a cookie at the edge of the table, when it was
suddenly smacked with a spatula by his wife.
"Stay out of those." she said, "They're for the
funeral."..........by Kathy P.

LAUGH OUT LOUD

The couple was 85 years old and had been married for sixty years.
Though they were far from rich, they managed to get by because
they watched their pennies. Though not young, they were both
in very good health, largely due to the wife's insistence on healthy
foods and exercise for the last decade. One day, their good health
didn't help when they went on a rare vacation and their plane
crashed, sending them off to Heaven. They reached the pearly
gates and St. Pete escorted them inside. He took them to a
beautiful mansion, furnished in gold and fine silks, with a fully
stocked kitchen and a waterfall in the master bath. A maid
could be seen hanging their favorite clothes in the closet. They
gasped in astonishment when he said, "Welcome to Heaven.
This will be your home now." The old man asked St. Peter how
much all this was going to cost. "Why, nothing," St. Peter
replied, "remember this is your reward in Heaven." The old
man looked out the window and right there he saw a champion-
ship golf course, finer and more beautiful than any ever built
on Earth. "What are the green fees?" grumbled the old man.
"This is Heaven," St. Peter replied. "You can play for free,
every day." Next they went to the clubhouse and saw the
lavish lunch buffet, with every imaginable cuisine laid out
before them, from seafood to steaks to exotic deserts, and
free flowing beverages. "Don't even ask," said St. Peter to
the man. "this is Heaven, it is all free for you to enjoy." The
old man looked around and glanced nervously at his wife.
"Well, where are the low fat and low cholesterol foods, and
the decaffeinated tea?" he asked. "that's the best part,"
St. Peter replied. "You can eat and drink as much as you
like of whatever you like, and you will never get fat or sick.
This is Heaven!" The old man pushed, "No gym to work
out?" "Not unless you want to," was the answer. "No
testing my sugar or blood pressure or..." "Never again.
All you do here is enjoy yourself." The old man glared at
his wife and said, "You and our stupid bran muffins. We
could have been here ten years ago!"
Heaven and Health by Simply Seniors Humor.....